There is an inordinate amount of people looking for the lyrics to the Smoking Cigarettes and Watching Captain Kangaroo song.  Imagine their dismay when they click on me…  On the other hand, I’m starting to think it was pretty ingenious of me to name a post that.  I’m getting heavy traffic, people. 

There is also an inordinate amount of naked young women in Hollywood.  I am no prude, but this sickens me.  I think largely due to the fact that I am a big High School Musical fan and the latest scandal involving Vanessa Hudgens has put a cloud over my beloved movies.  Whether or not Disney has fired her, does not bother me.  Although, I would be so very sad to see some other girl in HSM3. What absolutely DOES bother me is that a 19 year old girl from anywhere would be posing nude for anyone!

Okay.  I guess maybe that makes me a prude, then.

When I was 19?  I was not standing in a fancy hotel with my DOONEY AND BURKE handbag behind me, BUTT ASS NAKED.  Ugh.  I am just sick.

Her mother must be so proud.

I mean really.  I think body image is important. I think people should feel good about the way they look.  I do!  Girls especially.  But you don’t know anything when you are 19.  Or 20, or 25.  And, I think these young ladies of Hollywood are just driving that point home. 

Soon they will find that at 32, they probably know even less.

I didn’t wear a bikini until I was 26.  After I had Holden, and after I had lost all the baby weight, I thought to myself, Jennifer (this is what I call my Self) you are young, you are fit~ish.  Step out there and get that two peice.  And, I didn’t get a TANKINI, either.  I cannot say this enough: Commit, already.  Wear a bikini or wear a one peice.  Why would you want to buy a two peice that LOOKS like a one peice.  You just paid double.

What I’m trying to say here is that I didn’t really come into myself until I was 26.  And, really?  I didn’t really start holding my own until I was 30.  You think you are self actualized before then.  I did, too.  Trust me.  You aren’t even close.  I’m still finding new things about me everyday.

What we seem to have created in young women these days is that THIS is all they are going to be.  Right Now.  I will always be this me who is me today. I can party all the time because I’m rich and young and I deserve it.  You owe it to me.  I can be naked wherever and show my hoo ha to God only knows who, and it won’t matter tomorrow.

Oh, but it will!  Someday (soon I hope) you are going to say, Damn.  Perhaps I shouldn’t have done that because I am a YOUNG LADY and want to be treated like one.

Hey.  Kids who work for Disney?  If you don’t want a clean and wholesome image, do NOT sign the contract.  Oh, boo hoo you.  In a uber popular movie making Wayyyyyy more money than any kid should, and you have a wholesome image.  Somebody call the wahmbulance.

So here’s what I can’t stand: Kids.  Pretty much all of them.

Although, last nite, I was watching Life of Ryan on MTV, and I DID like this kid.  So, I take that back…here’s what I can’t stand: Kids.  Pretty much all of them.  Unless they ride skateboards.